It’s been a while since I sat down to write let alone reflectively journal. It’s almost a month now since I landed back from China #Chexit. I spent the first two weeks at home Ch’AdultingCʃhʌɪl’adʌlt,əˈdʌlt/ɪ ŋ/
(abiding by the laws set in your mother’s home. Incl. tasks such as cleaning, washing dishes, rising early and preparing food all in efforts to display that you have been well raised- yet preparing for looming adulting tasks Incl. budgeting/ bills-bills. Did I mention bills?
From my last two weeks in Cape Town I have officially crowned myself as the queen of administration. From finding a place to live, signing a lease, exchanging money, waiting in queues at the traffic department to get a license disk, registering, securing funding etc. etc. As a result, I haven’t quite had the energy to announce my arrival, nor have I mustered the focus to sit down and think and write. I have dozens of blog drafts.
Making: A life. Being back in Cape Town feels somewhat different yet the same. Deciding how to effectively use my time here feels like remaking a meaningful life in a place I had called home- yet left- to which I have now returned-(however as a somewhat different person).
Cooking: The other day I prepared homemade patties with cleanly boiled sweet potato decorated with diced avocado on the side. A real chef’s special (If I mus’say so myself).
After not cooking for a year (literally) I had slight anxieties about my abilities. Overall, it seems like your girls still got it.
Drinking: Kauai – Berry Dairy Smoothie. Seriously enjoying it right now. Once you have it, you kinda wanna savor the taste. If you drink it after a meal, you wish you’d just drank the smoothie and not had the meal. But if you drink it +30minutes after buying it, utility decreases dramatically. So “buy it & drink it” haha that could be a name for a smoothie store, don’t you think? “Buy & Drink it”, kind’of like “Pick & Pay.”
haaaa. I know, I know….
Reading: How to heal a pain in the arch, I hurt my arch whilst running the Brackenfell 15km race last weekend. In case you’re a runner in the Western Cape here’s a list of the race calendar for 2016. Earlier on I had started reading this journal article titled Foreign Policy Analysis: Actor-Specific Theory and the Ground of International Relations. This is to potentially tutor an International Relations major student with delays in responding due to aspects of the Asperger’s Syndrome.
Wanting: To sit down and create a workable weights lifting program. I’ve been going to the gym on and off for years, it never quite occurred to me that people have programs that they follow. I have found a few exercise schedules on bodybuilding.com and I am looking at the Insanity workout schedule and the p90x working out schedule, wanting to mix them up to create a holistic body training program.
“Gimme that joy I can’t explain
Add extra peace that’ll ease my pain
I want that love that’ll never change
Give me that, Give me that
Give me that power to walk away
When another God wants to take your place
As much of you as I can take
Give me that, Give me that
Wasting: No time on self-doubt. During a phone conversation with my sister yesterday the line “Be impatient with your doubts” came through. I thought it was quite profound.
Also wasting FETA cheese. I didn’t have much of it in China, now I’m adding it to every single dish I cook. I even sprinkle it as side deco on food and crackers. Haha. It’s fun and it’s sooo satisfying and it makes me feel cheffy. With that said the price of FETA makes me quickly break into food activism. Seriously though #Foodpricesmustfall #No’like’forreal
Sewing: I am starting to sound serious and philosophical with my “making a life” and now “sewing a future” lol. No but seriously, I’ve been seriously thinking about the optimal direction (career-wise) to take to make the greatest impact and towards becoming the best Sihle that I can be (aaah- all phily-so-phy again) but really. Deciding consciously on the direction to take is like weaving options. It’s like “sewing a future.” Hahaha!
It is.. Owe-Kay?! Haha!
Wishing: I could live in the same town as my sister, Schu. A few of her friends are visiting Cape Town and I’ll be showing them around the city soon. Whilst thinking about that it dawned on me that I haven’t lived in the same town as her since 2004. That’s a hell’a of a long time. Also, I am seriously crushing on her right now. She’s inspiringly real. For as long as I have known her she’s always spoken her mind, truthfully so.
Enjoying: My newly found gym community, consisting of 3 African mom’s. This past Friday we had thee most Real Girl chat in the Sauna. Additional to the benefits of using a Sauna, real conversations about subjects that my mother would never touch are happening with these ladies. I’m totes lovin’ it!
Liking: Nomfundo Xaluva a South African, Eastern Cape born vocalist, songwriter, piano extraordinaire. Her song’s Bayathetha and Themba lam are particular favourites. Let me stop ’cause I’m about to list all her songs. There’s a maturity in her voice and a refined talent. The wisdom in her lyrics…sometimes the words feel like lessons that would drop from my grandmother’s lips. Also xhantilam blog is an on-going favourite now. One of her articles that I liked the most is on The language of marriage. Her work feels relatable, she writes about black life code, womanhood, discourse, education & lessons from her classroom. I have conversation on her write-ups long after reading.
Wondering: How my kids are doing. Whilst studying at Peking I taught a group of 3-4 year olds English. After a year of weekly Saturday meet-up’s their little lives have found a special place in my heart.
Also wondering of my China friends, (中国朋好), especially my fromafricatochina.com ladies whom I left behind. Their presence was everything. Literally! Wondering if they know how much I loved every moment of our lives together.
Loving: Chinese/Mandarin. I got back home and got all antsy about learning Chinese again. So now I’ve joined two classes, an open group on a Monday and a course with forty five minute lectures, five days a week. I suddenly have a burning desire to learn the language.
The other thing I’m seriously loving *just being honest* is no longer being in a long distance. The time zones were the devils arrow (no I’m being serious) and the network hackles were nightmarish. Seeing Win real life and not on Skype is pure bliss.
Hoping: I can meet 2016 caineprize.com winner Lidudumalingani Mqombothi. His award winning fictional short story ‘Memories We Lost’ takes on the difficult subject of mental illness in African communities. Did I tell you, he lives in Cape Town and wait for it.. wait for it…he is from the Easternnn Cappe aka my home province.
I invited him on Facebook-inboxed him about his story-And now I’m like “can’t I meet him too?” My hopes remind me of this Xhosa song “Ndakunika isandhla, ndakunika nengalo, ndakunika amabele, hewena awuyazi oyifunayo.”
Anywho, you can listen to an audio version of his short story here.
Marveling: At my grandmother’s gratitude. In the second week of July we had an 80th surprise birthday for her, all organised by the grandchildren. Her gratitude and joy from the experience were so palpable. It was a weekend itinerary, beginning with a surprise sleep out at a hotel, followed by a massage the following morning and a party with all the cousins/ her grand children gathered from different cities and gifts-gifts-gifts.
Days later she said “when you look back on the painful days-wondering why God has kept you, you come to understand that He keeps you because He has reserved good days like this. To show you just how much He loves you.” Aaah *my heart* guys! She was uniquely grateful.
I am still moved thinking about her thankfulness and the excitement curled up in her voice as she told us about the experience-especially the massage. Absolutely Hilarious.
Needing: To buy socks. All sorts of warm and fuzzy socks. I also desperately need my foot to heal. I have a marathon that I dangerously & courageously signed up to do on September 18th.
Smelling: Guavas. Guavas are my favourite fruit at the moment. I even like the smell. So much so I contemplated placing guava’s versus stay ‘soft beneath my car seats. You know that trick right? Stay ‘soft (fabric softener) to give your car a scent.
Wearing: My green jacket. My granddad bought it for me. It’s so sentimental to me now that he has passed on. But I have been told by Wthat I wear if far too often. Which is funny to me. I left it behind when I went to China, he doesn’t know that I gave it a year long break. So… my love affair with this green jacket has just begun…
Following: I could tell you about my latest twitter follow’s. Robin Sharma , Khanyi Dhlomo & my personal superwoman Terry Pheto. But honestly, those are June news. Whom I’ve been really following through July is my boyfriend. I am embarrassingly in his face. Like…All! The! Time!
But to be fair… I hadn’t seen him in a year.
Noticing: Lately, I’ve been following rules. I only park where I am permitted to park. I stood at a traffic department queue for what felt like days to make sure I get my license disk renewed. Now that I am a legal driver (after 8 or 9 tries) I just don’t want to engage in illegal behaviour. So it seems friends, legality begets legality.
Knowing: That unrefined and ungracious words said in moments of casual conversation are capable of bringing hurt upon others. Unwholesome words that unconsciously slip out of the mouth (about another) can be like sharp nails that are carelessly driven yet with the power to harm/bruise the person being spoken of.
Thinking: Wow! Terry Pheto shared whom she’s voting for in tomorrow’s local government elections on Facebook. It’s not everyday that established celebrities share their political affiliations on social media.
Bookmarking: Top 10 things to do in Brisbane. I’ll tell you more about it closer to the time. But for now let me just say…. I won!!! I won an entire trip in a lucky draw! To Australiaaaaaa!
I’m getting excited all over again.
Opening: this YouTube link of my roomie (first year room mate) and closest of friends. She’s sharing her testimony! Watch it with me and be inspired!
Giggling: Yesterday I was in slight disbelief that I’ve managed to add so many not so necessary tasks on my schedule in under two weeks. Whilst standing in front of the mirror with my hands brushing through my weave I meekly said “I’m really not a serious person” W called me closer and quickly whispered to me “you are a serious person, you hear that, you are a serious person.” I cracked-it was so funny! It reminded me of an odd birthday call I got from my granddad a couple of years ago. His wish went something like this
“Happy birthday mntanam (my child)!
You are not rubbish, you hear that,
you are not rubbish,
Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday
You are not rubbish, you hear that” X7.
That was thee most odd reassurance, nevertheless a special birthday wish. I still giggle thinking about it.